Brene Brown studies human connection — our ability to empathize, belong, love. In a poignant, funny talk at TEDxHouston, she shares a deep insight from her research, one that sent her on a personal quest to know herself as well as to understand humanity. A talk to share.
Thanks to Leighton Hodges, a retired thereapist who had been one of my guests at the “Intimacies” Group when we met at BookPeople, for showing this to those of us who recently attended his engaging “Sex in the City” conversation group.
Giving voice to topics that are taboo is what made Betty Ford an inspiration for a generation. She was first lady of the United States from 1974 to 1977, during the presidency of her husband, Gerald Ford. Active in social policy, she shattered precedents as a politically active presidential wife. With her passing, comes remembrances of the paradigm shift she created.
Betty Ford’s comments weren’t the kind of genteel, innocuous talk expected from a first lady, and a Republican one no less. She spoke openly about breast cancer, when mention of a mastectomy was normally only whispered in private. The publicity helped bring the disease into the open and inspired countless women to seek breast examinations. Her revelations about her own own descent and recovery from substance abuse lead to the founding of the Betty Ford Center, which has helped celebrities from Elizabeth Taylor and Johnny Cash and yet keeps its rates relatively affordable and has served more than 90,000 people. She was a powerful advocate for women’s health and women’s rights. She spoke openly of how living together before marriage might be wise, and she said she wouldn’t be surprised if her daughter had had pre-marital sex. When I was coming of age, she was a role model whom I took to heart.
I was invited to speak this Sunday at the Public Affairs Forum at the First Unitarian Universalist Church of Austin – 4700 Grover Avenue Austin, TX 78756, (512) 452-6168. Forums start at 11:30 and last for one hour.
I expect to have fun and hope you will join me.
Here’s the program announcement:
Karen Kreps is Austin’s own version of Carrie Bradshaw, Ann Landers and Dr. Ruth. She is the author of Intimacies: Secrets of Love, Sex & Romance. She’ll share recollections and anecdotes from her seven years writing candid explorations of personal relationships, which appeared in a popular column published by The Good Life magazine (until the publication folded last year), and hosting public discussions about lovers and lust at BookPeople. She will address people’s Number One questions about relationships and encouraging audience questions and comments. No charge, just bring an open mind and a sense of humor.
June 13, 2010
11:30 am to 12:30 pm
4700 Grover Avenue
Austin, TX
Submit your Number One question and learn more about her book at TrueIntimacies.com
Karen has a Master of Arts Degree in Cinema Studies from New York University and works as an independent producer of creative web content, blogging about technology and social media at NetIngenuity.com
Twitter: For those who would like to Tweet about this event, the hash tag is #intimacies
The talk will be broadcast on ChannelAustin, channel 10. (Public Access TV), http://www.channelaustin.org. The times are TBA. I expect to get a copy of the recording and will post it on the web for remote viewing.
This film was co-written/produced/directed by Jane Scandurra, a fellow alum from Prodigy, where I worked for six years until I met my husband and followed him from New York to Austin. It’s about the growing population of single adults in this day, but I wish I had seen it back then, when I was single. It might have helped me feel more indepedent and legitimate as a single woman.
Behind closed doors in a nice South Austin neighborhood, fourteen strangers crowded into a small livingroom for a three-hour workshop on how to give a woman a sensual massage and make her feel safe and relaxed and fully surrender.
There were seven single men and two single women, including four couples, ages ranging from 27 to 77. Everyone seemed relieved to find a congenial group of normal-looking adults who were genuinely interested in learning and excited by the potential that the workshop promised.
Charla Hathaway, an erotic coach and author of the book, Erotic Massage: Sensual Touch for Deep Pleasure and Extended Arousal, welcomed everyone and explained the structure for the afternoon. There’d be an hour of introduction and discussion about sensual massage, followed by a demonstration (back, front and genital), and a wrap-up talk. She introduced herself and her model, on whom she would later demonstrate. The model was an attractive and charming young woman, totally at ease with nudity. She explained that she has been studying erotic arts in California and was very much looking forward to the massage she was about to get.
Charla put everyone at ease, elevating the energy with spiritual discussion of Tantric arts and respect for the human body. A high level of trust was established. She got everyone to share openly about what they wanted to let go of as they entered the class, what they wanted to bring into the experience and what they intended to get out of the experience. There were seven single men and two single women, including four couples, ages ranging from 27 to 77.
By the time everyone entered the massage room, circling around the table, there was so much respect in that room–between the students, to the model and teacher and for each our bodies. There was a shared sense of privilege to be privy to a very private, intimate affair, to be welcome to simply watch and or to try a couple of techniques on the model while under the careful guidance of the coach.
Charla demonstrated used of props like feathers and fur, cornstarch (yes, from out of the pantry) and oil to soothe and relax all the muscles. She got every to breathe in rhythm with the model as she explained and the model confirmed what where the most pleasurable strokes and approaches. As genital strokes were demonstrated on a live person, everyone asked respectful questions and the women shared their experiences and preferences. No massage was ever too slow. Breasts could never be massaged too much, but the nipples should be touched last. Asking permission before penetrating your lover’s body in any way was only decent.
While only the model got the massage, everyone present was touched and opened in new ways that would affect them for the rest of their adult lives.
–Karen Kreps is the author of Intimacies: Secrets of Live, Sex & Romance, and blogs at TrueIntimacies.com.
This just-released video was shot at SXSW09 Interactive. Paul Walhus interviews Karen Kreps about the Core Conversation she was about to host at SXSW on “Sex Ed Online: How Teens Self Savvy,” her background as a Web developer and the Austin lifestyle she enjoys.
